Today is the last day of September 2013. I've been "unemployed" now for three full months. This has been a year of turmoil followed by grace. Grace to be able to recover, grace to be able to leave an environment that has led me down a slow path of self-destruction. The last three months have been a process of bringing myself out of a very dark and deep place. I'm still not there yet. I've been learning that demons are difficult to leave behind, they have a way of following you wherever you go. So, I've been re-inspired tok take a journey inwards again and face a demon that I've been struggling with for a very long time - probably since high school. My addiction to food and alcohol. It's a challenge to admit this and knowing that this blog will remain private and personal, I am willing to do so here. I've been toying with the idea of a green juice fast for a very long time - 1 day, 3 day, 10 day, 60 day - and yet, since 2007, I have yet to succeed at doing such a thing. This past two months since returning from vacation in mid-July, I've thought I could conquer my food addiction simply by cutting down, cutting out, balancing - yet I've realized that I cannot do it. I simply cannot cut back, have one, skip it. So, rather than lose time and hope, I've decided to finally do it. Tomorrow is October 1st - I have no excuses. There will always be an invitation to a party, a dinner, a lunch, drinks, an event, birthday, family night, book club, game night, just plain craving a drink and chocolate night. Summer season is over - no fresh fruits anymore - tomatoes are almost all gone, basil is finished. I re-visited the documentary with Joe from Australia Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. So, tomorrow I start my 60 day juice fast. I'm going to CVS to get my numbers done and will explore my inner strength. I'm nervous, I'm scared, I'm excited, I'm determined, I'm hopeful. I'll post my numbers tomorrow along with some "before" photos and a short video clip that my mom will take. She is the only one I've told that I'm doing this - except my therapist. Wish me luck!